The man from Health & Safety says No!!!

For those of you who have experienced the Monte Toboggan ride, the following response from the Health & Safety Executive in the UK, will come as little surprise to you.... "Dear Sir,

I write in response to your request to commence the operation of a Madeiran style "toboggan" run in the UK, and whilst rejecting your application I have also set out the necessary amendments to your proposal that would be required prior to me considering your request again.

I would like to add that I found elements of your proposal disturbing and so dangerous that I cannot believe that this activity would be sanctioned in this or any other civilised country. Whilst you claim (and I use this word advisedly) that it has operated satisfactorily in Madeira for the last 100 years, I find this very hard to believe.

Amendments required: -

1. Construction of toboggan to be changed from "wicker-like" material to carbon fibre.
2. Roll bars, air-bags, dual disc brakes & 3-point seat belts to be installed.
3. All participants to where crash helmets at all times.
4. A more satisfactory steering mechanism to be installed replacing your laughable suggestion of steering the vehicle with pieces of rope attached to runners!!
5. The tobaggon run to be free of any traffic and/or onlookers.
6. The incline of the slope to be no more than 10 degrees to ensure that the vehicle does not exceed a speed of 8 mph
7. All sides of the "course" to be clad in foam rubber to minimise the possibility of any injury or damage.

Once the above has been achieved I will be willing to re-consider, but in no way can I guarantee that I will not have thought of some additional requirements that you will need to fulfill, to stop you from having any fun.

Yours blah, blah, blah

HSE