A matter of intonation

Whether or not life mirrors art or vice versa, to a degree the local high street mirrors English society.

Increased affluence is mirrored by the rise in the number of 'Travel Agents';

Increased need for an immediate response via mobile forms of communication has been mirrored by the rise in the number of 'mobile phone shops';

Increased size of the girths of the nation is mirrored by the rise in the number of 'Fast Food' establishments, although both of these 'descriptors' (i.e. Fast & Food)are generally open to challenge under the Trade Descriptions Act.

The increased desire to place our children in the best state schools has led to a rise in house moves, house prices; and 'Estate Agents', (exactly what 'Estates' are they 'Agents' for?).

The reason to get closer to the better schools is to stand a better chance of "the offspring" eventually getting to University, and helping Tony, Gordon and their “pals” achieve their goal of 50% of children going to institutions of academic excellence such as East Grinstead University of Fine Arts or the Solihull University of English (?).

If you were to remove all of the estate agents, travel agents, fast food agents, and mobile phone shop agents from the high street, what would you be left with? A few dress shops, 13 shoe shops, Robert Dyas and an Ann (apologies for the slight stutter) Summers shop.

Now take away every current High Street shop that sells items that can be bought over the Internet, to see what will be left in 5 years time...and you can see that all that will remain is 'Fast Food' establishments and coffee shops!!

The remaining space in the high street may have to be transformed into a giant parcel collection depot for people to pick up (and then return because they invariably won't be “as described in the catalogue”) their “Internet” purchases.

Whether or not it is true that the most common phrase that newly qualified and employed graduates use is... “Would you like fries with that?”, it remains questionable whether or not there will be enough “challenging”, “non-retail” jobs to go round, but also whether there will be any “retail” jobs of any description either.

So when your friend tells you that their son or daughter is going train to be a Barrister, it may be (especially if they're a Geordie) that they are actually going to train to be a Barista. But with competition for jobs growing at an inversely proportional rate to the future number of opportunities, who knows, such jobs may requires a degree, training contract, 'Bar' exam, and graduation from the Starbucks University of Coffee Excellence!